Zeslie Zilpha Zion: A Roadshow Musical

by Skye

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released January 7, 2013

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Skye Hawaii

Skye frolics through and delves into in ev'ry metaphorical acre of the expansive, fruitful meadow of the creative arts. He's an amateur author, actor, artist, comedian, composer, film-maker, musician, playwright, singer-songwriter, and just plain ol' writer. He also likes drumming out rhythms on his thighs.

He doesn't really know what he's doing, but, needless to say, he's doing a lot of it.
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Track Name: The End of the Alphabet
THE ZIONS
Love at home,
Love at home,
Time doth softly sweetly glide
When there's love
at home…

ZESLIE
My family,
I love them,
And I'm happy,
I am, I am,
But I'm also last of all.
Will no one liste-en?

I'm the eldest and
The mediator.
So please understand
That lately "later"
Is something I'd call
A little missi-in'.

First name Zeslie,
Last name Zion,
I'm a recipe
for social disaster.

AL
More like NATURAL disaster.

ZESLIE
Despite being lastly,
I keep on tryin',
When you're a triple Z,
You couldn't be laster.

AL
Zeslie's important,
Who knows how a snore went
Without all the Zs in her name?
Gonna remind you, so you don't forget.
She's at the end of the alphabet.

ZESLIE
I have a clear right to being upset
I'm the end of the alphabet.
Track Name: If They'd Follow
DAD
Hmmmmmmmm--

MOM
--mmmmmmmm--

MOM and DAD
We'll think about it.

ZESLIE
But what if it takes you 365 days to think about it?

MOM and DAD
Then it takes 365 days. But we WILL be thinking about it.

ZESLIE
But we do things fairly in our family-- how can that possibly be fair? When you ask ME to make a decision, you expect me to make it quickly, don't you?

MOM and DAD
Sometimes the right decision is not to make a decision yet.

ZESLIE
Why are you guys talking like that?

MOM and DAD
Parentaaaal instiiiinctt!--

ZESLIE
...
Parental instinct?
It stinks to be stuck in the background--
Going backwards-- I'm cursed.
But if I were a parent,
It'd be so apparent,
That I'd put them first…
'Cause I would be first...!

I'd make each right decision,
I'd teach the proper path to go,
I'd give them TRULY fair provision,
We'd all grow,
if they'd follow.

No more yelling, no more ignoring,
And just like me, we'd all soar
I know how things could be
If they'd just listen to me…

AL
Zes-a-lieeeee--

ZESLIE
Al, I'm not in the mood.

AL
The Zs must stand for zero.
That's all the credit you receive.
But could the Z stand for Zzzzuperhero?
Oh man… I believe!

BUT would you kick all of our butts with your big head
I'm a butthead, but, you'd butt heads instead?
Or WOULD YOU JUST YELL IN MY EAR
'STEAD-A KICKIN' MY REAR—

ZESLIE
Al.

AL
Supersonic nagging powers!

ZESLIE
Al.

AL
'Scuuuuuse me? You'll have to say that louder, sis!

ZESLIE
AL!--
Track Name: The End of the Alphabet Reprise
ZESLIE
First name Zeslie,
Last name Zion,
Think I'm finding
I've grown more than I thought.

I might be lastly,
I'll keep on tryin'.
They all will mind ME
Now I can't be forgot.

I'm starting to think I'm more than mere human.
Think I'm fin'lly… a young woman.
Track Name: If They'd Follow Reprise
ZESLIE
I'd make each right decision…

BAIT
You'd teach the proper path to go,

ZESLIE
And give them TRULY fair provision,

BAIT
We'd all grow…

ZESLIE
If they'd… follow.
Track Name: Zeslie's Realization
ZESLIE
Oh, no… what have I done?
The right choice isn't right
Unless you could choose the wrong one.

Making all the choices
Stifles all the voices.
I can't make it for them.
Might as well ignore them.
I can't make them see things.
I can't make them say things.
I can't make them be things.
Though I might not like the way things are…

XACK NARRATION
We're better off making our own err-arrrrs!
Track Name: Finale
NEPHI
SOOOOOOOOOO—
Zeslie Zilpha Zion became
A (p)sychic spiritual superhero.
Her Zs flipped round to Ss.

AL
That’s lame!

XACK
Well, shows how much you know.
She went on to be
on the JPO
There’s no more car crashes
‘Cause stop and go
Is a thing that she says very well.

FAITH and TEACHER
… With her mind!

EVERYONE but BAIT
And no one is left behind!

ZESLIE
And our fam-i-ly life’s
Still a hassle, but I’ve
Figured out that we learn
When everybody discerns
For themselves

MOM
What is “right”--

DAD
What is “wrong”--

ZESLIE
THAT’S what makes all of us strong...

BAIT
(indecipherable)

ZESLIE
… In-case you’re wondering, he said—(drops Bait)

EVERYONE but BAIT
AND THAT’S THE END OF OUR SOONNNNG!
Track Name: The End of the Alphabet (Instrumental)
This is an instrumental track.
Track Name: If They'd Follow (Instrumental)
This is an instrumental track.
Track Name: The End of the Alphabet Reprise (Instrumental)
This is an instrumental track.
Track Name: If They'd Follow Reprise (Instrumental)
This is an instrumental track.
Track Name: Zeslie's Realization (Instrumental)
This is an instrumental track.
Track Name: Finale (Instrumental)
This is an instrumental track. I'm going to eat your toes while you're sleeping.